June 22, 2005 - (HOSTSEARCH.COM) - In web hosting cosmic epistemology news today a new technology has been unveiled that links cell phones to the internet creating, as advertised anyway, a direct link to The Almighty via Angel.
Internet service providers and web hosts are certain to be scrambling to host the new handheld mobile Internet service that allows customers direct contact with the Divine.
Mobile phone and Internet technology or spiritual medium company (were not sure really), Ask G.O.D. will unveil "Phoneternet" - a new service that will offer users their own personal internet search expert or "Angel" at their beck and call 24/7.
By dialing a toll-free number, Ask G.O.D.'s Angels will retrieve the answer to any question, including mundane questions regarding language translation, sports scores, mixed drink recipes to more difficult questions like What is the physics formula for kinetic energy?, or even trick questions like, What is the average air speed velocity of an un-laden swallow? (African or European? being the correct answer, of course.)
Customers of Ask G.O.D. can also ask for any other information only limited by your imagination and available on the Internet, according to the company.
In addition to giving an immediate answer to a caller's query while they are on the phone, Ask G.O.D. will, at the customer's request, text message the answer, email it, and add it to the user's searchable online account history. Users too busy to place a call can use Ask G.O.D.'s short code, 41411, to text message their query and have their answer immediately text messaged back.
The Pope in Rome was not immediately available for comment on the new service which could be seen as direct and highly heretical competition to the Catholic line of communication with God.